Me: Do you think chivalry has become rare?
Her: Well… Chivalrous men are an endangered species… probably extinct. But why that question all of a sudden?
Me: I just wanted to know what you thought… (taking a sip of my coffee) So, What is it that you expect ‘men’ to do?
Her: You know, hold the door open for a woman, offer her a seat… treat her like a lady! I dont think its that hard, but men off late barely care. I have seen more than my fair share of rudeness from the opposite sex. What is it so much trouble to be a little nice?
Me: (A little startled) Frankly, I am incapable of defending all men on this planet… and the few off it too but I can tell you what I follow with respect to Chivalry.
(She picked up her cup for a sip… probably a part of her knew this would be long)
Me: There is a certain amount of respect I show women, you wont see me running off towards closed doors coz I see a lady approaching it… But if I am close to a door and a lady is following me, I would most often hold the door open for her. Again sometimes I might forget or might be in a hurry… But I honestly admit one thing, I choose people whome I am very kind to. For such people I wouldn’t mind going out of my way to help them or make them comfortable.
Her: So these are like people who are kind to you?
Me: Not necessarily, sometimes just the fact that they dont expect someone to be so kind to them that motivates it. I really hate people who dictate what has to even volunteered. I have know people who expect to be helped when they dont need it and could easily have done the act by themselves… I lose my drive to go out of my way to help such people. I have known many women who have in the name of chivalry tried to take advantage of people around me… But on the flip side there are really amazing women I have known who would go out of their way to help out someone. Its those women that make me want to open doors and offer seats to.
(She stared into her cup… pondering)
Me: In the end I guess its a matter of opinion. Where would you draw the line in being kind to someone? Its bad to smother someone with too much kindness and worse to not be kind at all.
Her: The odd thing, our ideas are pretty similar. I dont expect everyone to treat every lady as a princess or something. Just that it would be so much nicer if people in general where a little kinder and nicer.
Me: Its hard for a single person to change, let alone millions of them… But what is really true is that people I have been kind to almost always return the favor.
Her: But its sad isnt it… That we should expect people to be kind and nice. Shouldn’t that be inbuilt into everyone. Think about it we actually “appreciate” an act of kindness. Shouldn’t kindness be the norm… Its very sad that its acceptable to “not be kind” and go on about in your way… I guess thats where the question of Chivalry finally stems from… (with a simile) Women you see want the world to be a much nicer place…